The People Anxiousness Report is a weekly rundown of the folks and issues we’re at the moment most frightened about on the present. It would get bizarre as a result of most of the folks and issues we might be worrying about might be instruments in a plot to wreck America, put in movement by one other nation. Blame the present for this, not us.
10. The workers at Philip’s journey company (Final week: 9)
Philip is an excellent spy and perhaps not an excellent businessman. I don’t know for positive. Perhaps he did all the pieces proper and simply bought hosed by timing. However regardless of the trigger, issues will not be nice for the journey company proper now. Belts might be tightened. Positions might be eradicated. Cowboy boots might be boxed up and put away. No quantity of tacky bookstore motivational classes can change that.
I really feel dangerous for Rick. All these cruises offered for nothing.
9. Gennadi (Final week: 7)
Maybe you’re taking a look at Gennadi’s place on this week’s rankings and saying to your self, “Wait, how precisely did he fall two spots down the listing after an episode through which we realized Elizabeth and the Centre are decided to assassinate him to keep away from the disgrace of a hockey participant from the Russian nationwide staff popping up in Time Journal to speak about how nice America is? Isn’t that worse than him simply being, like, unhappy, like he was final week? It’s nearly like there’s no logic in any respect being utilized to those rankings, as if you’re simply winging it based mostly on intestine emotions within the moments after every episode ends.”
eight. Kimmy (Final week: Unranked)
Contemplate me extraordinarily relieved that Kimmy seems to be in a greater place after the three-year time bounce. Philip’s missions together with her at all times creeped me out a lot though Philip tried to be as honorable as one may very well be whereas platonically seducing a lonely teenage woman to get info from her well-connected father. However now the ability dynamic is switched. She’s the assured one, going to Greece, telling him to go to Fiji, giving him life recommendation. It felt slightly higher. Nonetheless bizarre. However higher.
However 10 cups of espresso per day is simply too many for a rising younger grownup. Dial it again, Kimmy.
7. Cute Brian from Sociology class (Final week: Unranked)
Oh man, Cute Brian is in a lot hassle. He doesn’t even understand it but. He thinks he simply met a fairly woman from his class and the 2 of them hit it off after drinks. Cute Brian should be freaking jazzed. However whereas he’s sleeping, Paige/Julie is taking a look at his entry badge the best way a hungry man seems to be at a plate of scorching fajitas which can be meant for one more desk, regardless of strict directions from Elizabeth that she is to not combine intercourse and enterprise, not but at the least, not that they ever do this type of factor, okay perhaps as soon as, however these we rogue operatives who bought in too deep, HEY PAIGE LOOK OVER THERE.
However sure, Cute Brian is hosed. Paige is gonna push too laborious and screw it up after which Elizabeth must kill him. Relaxation in peace, man.
6. Elizabeth (Final week: eight)
Elizabeth now has a streak of 4 straight episodes the place she’s needed to kill somebody as a result of a mission bought bungled.
Ep. 1 – Safety creep who had Paige’s ID
Ep. 2 – Normal within the woods
Ep. three – Warehouse man in resort
Ep. four – A number of safety guards within the tried sensor heist
It’s not an important run. Plus there’s the cyanide capsule factor and the factor the place Philip and Oleg are following her and the factor the place she’s overtly mendacity to Paige concerning the job and mendacity to her coworkers about who Paige even is and the factor the place she’s smoking a pack a day of unhappy porch cigarettes and feeling “drained on a regular basis.” Her largest break this week was that her different mission — taking her “affected person” out for a World Collection get together — went to crap with out her having to kill anybody. She simply ended up lined in vomit. Type of a win, all issues thought of.
5. Oleg (Final week: four)
I don’t like how that is shaking out for Oleg. I sense doom on the horizon, for him in America or for his household in Russia or each. I don’t prefer it. Oleg has by some means develop into my favourite non-Henry individual on the present, although he spent a few years as a Russian spy who was hellbent on destroying the nation I reside in. The truth that he’s attempting to do a troublesome however “good” factor now makes it even worse, as a result of folks on this present who attempt to do the proper factor usually get steamrolled. I’m not ready for Oleg to die or be locked away in a piece camp. I’m simply getting used to his beard.
four. Philip (Final week: 2)
Philip Jennings is a tragic and damaged man who is barely completely satisfied when he’s line dancing with the workers he’ll in all probability have to fireside quickly. I hope he will get a canine or one thing. I’m frightened.
three. Stan (Final week: 6)
Observe this spiral of doom: Stan is following Oleg. Oleg is assembly with Philip. Philip is snooping on Elizabeth. Elizabeth is following Stan. Stan is following Oleg. Oleg is assembly with Philip. Philip is snooping on Elizabeth. Elizabeth is following Stan. Stan is following Oleg. Oleg is assembly with Philip. Philip is snooping on Elizabeth. Elizabeth is following Stan. Stan is following Oleg. Oleg is assembly with Philip. Philip is snooping on Elizabeth. Elizabeth is following Stan.
You get my drift right here.
There’s a non-zero likelihood all 4 of them find yourself in the identical park some night time, Stan spying on Oleg and Philip, Elizabeth spying on Stan, all of them standing in a circle simply pointing at one another like “You recognize him? However meaning… and should you’re over there… in a faux mustache… then I’m…” till all of it dawns on them what an odd spiderweb they’ve all been dwelling in.
That ends poorly for Stan, by the best way. Initially, he’ll be outnumbered, even when Philip, Elizabeth, and Oleg have some points to type out later. Second of all, he’ll be so unhappy. His two finest buds assembly on the market with out him. Devastating.
2. Henry (Final week: 1)
GoFundMe to pay Henry’s senior yr tuition to maintain him at his fancy prep faculty and away from the bickering spycraft hell his household residence has develop into in his absence. I’ll donate $1,000. It’s that necessary to me.
1. Paige (Final week: three)
I don’t like this. Honeypot Paige isn’t one thing I’m ready to take care of. This is not going to do in any respect.
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